Ex-FIFA Official Uses Onion Article in Defense

at 12:47 pm | By

Jack Warner Uses The Onion to Prove FIFA’s Innocence

 

Jack Warner in his Defense Statement

Jack Warner (Official Page)/Facebook

Former FIFA Vice President Jack Warner of Trinidad and Tobago was one of 14 FIFA officials arrested on wide scale corruption and racketeering charges last week. However, Warner is going on the offensive when it comes to his defense: He released a video essentially saying ‘Hey, FIFA isn’t all that bad guys.’

Obviously Warner understands the general perception of FIFA, a reason why he brings facts to the table and not just clichéd opinions. Exhibit A: The Onion, who published an article last week claiming that FIFA had announced an impromptu World Cup to begin in the United States immediately, and Warner believed it as true.

His full statement about the article below:

“After all of these accusations, the president of FIFA, Sepp Blatter, has been reelected for a fifth consecutive term. If I was so bad, and if FIFA is so bad, how come the head of FIFA is not? And then I look to see that FIFA has “frantically announced 2015 World Cup.” 2015, this year. If FIFA is so bad, why is it that the USA wants to keep the FIFA World Cup? Why is it that we have games on May 27th, two days before FIFA election? Why is it the U.S. authorities sought to embarrass FIFA in Zurich? Something has to be wrong.
I made the point to you over and over that all this thing has stemmed from the failed U.S. bid to host the World Cup.”

But to begin and wonder how Warner could have believed this satirical article (especially when no sports news outlets are reporting about this impromptu World Cup) and the fact that some European Leagues, including the Champions Leagues, had yet to finish their seasons or the fact that the Copa America is set to begin in a few weeks. You would think one of these would’ve tipped Warner off that the article may not be factual.

But maybe this is the ultimate defense move: because if he’s dumb enough to cite an Onion article as an official source, it is hard to believe he could have been at the forefront of a international, multi-decade criminal organization.

Either way, FIFA’s level of weirdness gets closer to its level of corruption each day.


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